How Do You Teach Kids about Resolutions? | 5 Tips for New Year’s for Kids

The New Year is coming. A new year, like a new week, is a great time to reflect, refresh, and set meaningful goals. And these are great principles to teach our kids too. But how do you teach kids about resolutions? How do you explain resolution to a child in a way they understand? What are some kid-friendly resolution ideas? These are the questions we’re digging into in this post. I hope these 5 tips for New Year’s resolutions for kids help create a time of connection and growth in your home.

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One day I noticed one of my kids had put up a poster on the ceiling above their bed. As I turned my head at an awkward angle to read the words written and decorated there, I was pleasantly surprised to see a list of goals. These goals showed what was important to my child.

Over time, I saw this child in quiet moments, following through with the chosen goals.

This kid had taken to heart discussions about goals and was now experiencing the joy of progress.

New Year’s is an ideal time to learn about goals and what’s required to reach those goals.

5 Tips for How to Teach Kids about Resolutions

Here are five tips for how to teach kids about resolutions at New Year’s.

1. Clearly Explain Resolution to a Child

Resolution is a seasonal word. It gains popularity with the new year and fades in usage come February. So, it’s not surprising that many kids have no idea what a resolution is.

In the context of New Year’s, Webster defines resolution as “something that is resolved…a formal expression of opinion, will, or intent.” Resolve means “to make a definite and serious decision to do something.”

So, how do you explain resolution to a child?

One way to explain resolution so a child can understand is that a resolution is something you decide to do. Usually, a New Year’s resolution is a decision to do something you really want to do or become a better or healthier person. A resolution is a goal that you’re really committed to.

Discussion Questions about Resolutions

Anytime we’re teaching, it’s important to ask questions and have a discussion, rather than giving a lecture. Here are some questions you could use to spark discussions with kids about resolutions:

• Is it important to set goals? Why?
• Have you ever set a goal and reached it? How did it feel? What helped you reach your goal?
• Why is it sometimes hard to reach our goals?
• Can you think of someone who set a resolution or goal and worked hard to reach it? Let’s think about characters from books or movies or people we know in real life.
• Do you think some goals are more important than others? Why?

2. Focus on Progress, Not Perfection

Whenever we talk about goals or resolutions or life in general, it’s mentally and emotionally healthy for us to focus on progress, not perfection. We all make mistakes. There are often setbacks and unforeseen challenges. Sometimes we don’t even reach our goals, especially if we have a timeframe. Progress often takes much longer than we think it will.

Perfection is impossible. But we don’t need perfection. We need progress. Progress leads to joy.

Growth Mindset for Kids

Carol Dweck has done a lot of research about a characteristic that she found helps people learn from mistakes, pursue challenges, and succeed. She calls it growth mindset.

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Someone with a growth mindset is focused on growth and progress and importantly sees themselves as capable of change. They might think things like I’ve worked hard to learn about math, I don’t know how to sing on pitch yet, or if I put in the effort I can get better at basketball. A person with a growth mindset sees mistakes as an opportunity to learn.

On the other hand, a person with a fixed mindset sees their abilities as set. They might think things like I was born smart, I’m a terrible singer, or sports just aren’t my thing. A person with a fixed mindset struggles with mistakes because those mistakes seem to be proof of their limitations. Mistakes are something to hide, be ashamed of, or fear.

The great news about growth mindset is that we can learn it. We can change from having a fixed mindset to having a growth mindset. So, talk about growth mindset with your kids. Normalize mistakes and show healthy ways of handling them. Emphasize YET when talking about challenges: I haven’t figured this out YET.

Point out when you notice effort and growth for your child.

Focus on progress, not perfection.

3. Choose Approach Goals, Rather than Avoidance Goals

Put simply, approach goals or resolutions are things you want to do. On the other hand, avoidance goals are things you want to stop doing. For example, if you want to eat healthier, an example of an approach goal is to eat five servings of vegetables a day. An example of an avoidance goal is stop eating sweets.

Research has shown that approach goals lead to more positive evaluations of ourselves and better sense of well-being.

Additionally, as humans we are creatures of habit. Our brains love to form habits. So, it’s much easier to focus on forming a new habit than breaking an old habit.

So, as you teach kids about resolutions, help them form resolutions that are approach focused.

Get Specific with Approach Goals

The more specific we are with our goals, the better we’ll be able to reach them. For example, if a child really wants to get better at soccer, we can talk about what that takes. Do you want to focus on foot skills? Speed or endurance? Or shooting? What will it take to get better? When do you think you could practice?

So, a general resolution could be to get better at soccer. A more powerful specific resolution could be to practice soccer everyday after school with at least ten minutes of foot skills.

4. Let Kids Choose their Own Resolutions

While we often feel like we know what’s best for our kids and are blessed with experience to help them, everyone is more motivated by goals they choose themselves. So, instead of choosing resolutions and presenting them to your kids, have a discussion and in the end, let your kids choose their own resolutions.

During your discussion, talk about what some ideas could be. It’s helpful to brainstorm first where every idea is a good idea. Get creative and dream big about what would be helpful or fun to accomplish or become.

Related: New Year’s Resolution Worksheet

Feel free to offer guidance. Then step back and let kids decide.

Here are some ideas you could suggest to get your brainstorming started.

Kid-Friendly Resolution Ideas

• Do at least one kind thing a day for someone in the family.
• When I feel upset, take three deep breaths.
• Practice an instrument or sport for a set amount of time each day.
• Read for twenty minutes a day.
• Invite someone new to play at recess or come over once a week.
• Do a service once a week like making a card for someone, giving a compliment, or helping extra around the house.
• When I feel annoyed with a sibling, think about three things I appreciate about that sibling.
• Say a personal prayer before bed every night.
• Work on homework each day right when I get home from school, so I can learn and turn in my homework on time.
• Respond the first time Dad or Mom ask me to do something.

Have fun with this! Brainstorming ideas for growth is exciting. Dream big and think about what would feel exciting to accomplish or become.

5. Make New Year’s Resolutions a Family Affair

Study after study shows that having support or accountability can help us reach our goals. Additionally, kids learn so much when what they see us do matches what we say. Plus, setting resolutions together can be really fun!

You can set a family resolution for the New Year or set individual resolutions but help support each other. Maybe you have a time each week to sit together as a family and write about how your resolutions are going. (You can use this New Year’s Tracker for that.)

It can be really powerful when we ask our kids how we can best support them with their goals. When the idea starts with the kids, it feels very supportive rather than nagging. Plus, it shows our kids that what’s important to them is important to us.

Lastly, share how you’ve set resolutions and how they’re going for you. Set the example of learning from mistakes and focusing on progress. Don’t be too hard on yourself! Remember, life is about who we’re becoming and how we show-up much more than something we can check-off a list.

New Year’s Resolutions are Worth It

Sometimes it feels like we set the same New Year’s resolutions year after year. Many people grow cynical about the idea of resolutions. However, I’ve also seen in my own life and with my kids that some resolutions lead to renewed effort and actual growth.

If big resolutions feel exciting, encourage your kids to go for it. But even focusing on little changes for the better make a difference. I hope these tips are helpful as you teach your kids about resolutions! Good luck with them, and happy New Year!

Have you done resolutions with your kids before? What’s been helpful for them? Do you have any other questions about how to teach kids about resolutions? Share in the comments!

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