5 Things You Can Do When You Feel Unfulfilled as a Mother [How to Find More Purpose and Passion in Motherhood]

Mothering isn’t all cupcakes and rainbows. It’s hard. It’s tiring, and sometimes it has the best of us wondering if we can hack it. It can also leave us feeling bored, frustrated, and unfulfilled. However, motherhood can also be deeply fulfilling. There is a potential within parenting for profound personal growth, soul-stretching sacrifice, and overwhelming joy. So here are five things you can do when you feel unfulfilled as a mother, in order to find more purpose and passion in motherhood.

This post contains affiliate links. By shopping through these links you support Lovin’ Life with Littles at no additional cost to you. Thank you for that support! Here’s the full disclosure.

First off, if you’re not feeling totally satisfied with mothering right now, there’s nothing wrong with you.

Mothers often feel unfulfilled or bored with the monotony. Some feel sad or depressed and wonder how moms find joy. We might not feel important or smart or interesting when we spend a lot of our time in what feels mundane. We struggle and feel frustration. All of these emotions are “normal.” You are not alone.

These emotions don’t make you a bad mom. Let go of any shame associated with how you feel about being a mother.

Then embrace the reality that just because we feel something right now, it doesn’t mean we have to feel it forever.

There is so much choice involved in what kind of life we live, what we focus on, and which perspectives we embrace. We can learn and change to find more joy in motherhood. It’s okay to miss life before kids, but we don’t have to dwell there. Remember, what we feed grows.

So decide how you would like to be, how you would like to feel about your role as a mom. If feeling more fulfilled in mothering is on that list, here are five ideas that might be helpful.

5 Things You Can Do When You Feel Unfulfilled as a Mother

These five ways to feel more fulfillment in motherhood will help you find purpose and passion, which leads to joy and contentment.

1. Focus on Progress

Tony Robbins once said in a podcast, “The number one thing you need to be happy is progress. Progress equals happiness.”

Sometimes when we’re changing diapers all day it doesn’t feel like we’re making much progress. Throw in having the same conversation over and over with our kids (“Please don’t argue. Please don’t argue. Seriously, PLEASE DON’T ARGUE.”) and we can feel down right stuck in the mud.

However, with a focus on progress (not perfection) we can recognize ways that we are actually progressing and intentionally create more growth.

Sometimes it’s helpful to consider different aspects of our lives and how we might progress within those.

For example, do you want to set a goal to progress physically? Maybe you can get the kids used to stroller rides with a couch to 5K program. If intellectual development sounds appealing, find a new podcast to listen to while folding laundry, or prioritize ten minutes of reading before bed.

We can progress spiritually as we intentionally interact with our kids in more loving ways or deepen our spiritual practices with some devoted time each day. Our families can progress by choosing a new routine we want to develop and then tracking that progress.

We can feel more joy and fulfillment in mothering as we focus on progress.

2. Deepen your Connections

Just because we are in the same house as our children, it doesn’t mean we are necessarily connecting. Sometimes life with Littles can leave us lacking the human connection we crave, those connections that bring fulfillment and lasting happiness. When this happens, we can both create new relationships and deepen the ones we already have with our children and other adults.

Strengthen Your Relationships with Your Children

Deepen your connections with people, starting with those in your own home.

We can connect on a new level even with little kids who can’t talk yet. Look into eyes, laugh together, listen, or get to know each other with meaningful conversation. Try to see life from your child’s perspective. Be intentional about the ways you spend your time together and how you choose to discipline, inserting love into all you do. Overall, choose to be present.

Click image for purchasing information.

Related: 25+ Ways to Connect with Kids

Build Strong Relationships with Other Adults

Additionally, recognize that you can’t and don’t need to do it alone. Find a tribe who can help and support you in both the physical and emotional loads of motherhood. Be someone else’s tribe.

Be open and honest with your spouse or other key relationships. Find a grandmother figure, sister, or mother friend to share life. Whether we are connecting over children and meal plans or cross-fit and hobbies, there is a strength that comes from sisterhood.

Related: How (and Why) to Build a Strong Parenting Tribe

There might be seasons of loneliness as we traverse life. However, these seasons don’t have to last forever. Create new connections and deepen the ones you already have to find more fulfillment.

3. Lean into your Purpose

Viktor Frankl was a psychiatrist imprisoned in concentration camps during World War II. He related an experience of helping two individuals who had talked about committing suicide. Each man was saved by the realization of something only he could do in life. For one, it was be the father to his waiting child. For the other, it was finish the scientific book series he had begun writing.

Frankl wrote in Man’s Search for Meaning, “This uniqueness and singleness which distinguishes each individual and gives a meaning to his existence has a bearing on creative work as much as it does on human love.” When a person recognizes this meaning,

“He knows the ‘why’ for his existence, and will be able to bear almost any ‘how.’”

Click image for purchasing information.

What is the purpose of your life right now?

A simple exercise can help us begin to recognize and lean into that purpose. First, list your personal gifts or talents. (We ALL have them.) Next, brainstorm ways you could use those personal gifts and talents to serve other people, both inside and outside of your home.

Sometimes when we take a moment to dig deep, we realize that our unique skill set is perfectly designed to help the specific children we mother.

Great purpose and fulfillment can be found when we utilize our uniqueness to serve others.

Related: Find and Fulfill Your Personal Purpose as a Stay-at-Home Mom

4. Prioritize Soul Care

At some point, we have to decide that we are worth taking care of too. So if you haven’t made that decision yet, no time is better than right now. Recognize that you are a better mother when you eat, move, and do the things that bring you to life. Do it for the kids if you need to, but someday, do it for you. You are worth it.

Make a list of things that bring you joy, those things that help you progress or fulfill your purpose. Maybe you exercise for ten minutes a day. Being your child’s jungle gym while exercising is better than not moving at all. Trade babysitting with a friend and take an hour a week to pursue a passion or sit in the quiet.

There’s never going to be enough time for everything. Choose to let something else fall by the wayside (ironing is definitely on that list for me!) and make self care, or soul care, a priority.

Related: Be Less Busy: 20 Things to Cut from Your Busy Parenting Schedule

5. Step Away from Social Media

Step away from the social media scroll that tells us how we should be doing things and shows us all the fabulous things we don’t have and places we aren’t going. Our grandmothers might have had it easier when there was no social media showing them how wrong they were to hang their laundry just so.

Step away from the social media that makes us feel not quite good enough.

Get some space from the social media that makes it harder for us to be present with our children and the other people around us. Step away from the social media that can suck our time without us even realizing it.

Use some of that time to get out of the house.

Nobody is meant to stay within the same four walls for too long. Get out. Walk the neighborhood, get involved in the community, smile at people, enjoy nature. Remember the big picture.

Our work is bigger than wiping snotty noses and putting edibles on the table, although every small act matters. Our work is about nurturing little ones to become happy, healthy, contributing humans. We are preparing these kids for the big beautiful world beyond our homes.

Do Less to Feel More Fulfillment

Perhaps the truth lies in recognizing that in order to feel more fulfillment, we don’t actually have to do more. Sometimes we hold ourselves to such an expectation of “achievement” (whether that is in what our house looks like, how the children behave, or what career we are building) that we don’t have time to prioritize those things that might be more fulfilling.

Whether they come from society or an inner voice, choose to let go of some of the “shoulds” we constantly face. Give yourself the freedom to live, try a new routine, and learn from mistakes as you go.

Motherhood is often hard. And some stages are harder than others. All aspects of life have difficult seasons. So while we might feel unfulfilled as a mother right now, that feeling doesn’t have to last.

Just like any other skill, we can develop and hone our mothering perspective, routines, and focus so that we find greater and greater fulfillment and joy.

What do you do when you feel unfulfilled as a mother? What helps you feel more joy and contentment in motherhood, and what struggles do you still face? Please share in the comments, send an email, or schedule a call.

I’m sharing this post “5 Things You Can Do When You Feel Unfulfilled as a Mother [How to Find More Purpose and Passion in Motherhood]” at some of these Link Parties I Love! Thank you hosts!

Was this post helpful for you? If so, please share it on Pinterest!

Do you like what you’re reading?

Subscribe to receive more great tips, free downloads, and inspiration to simplify your parenting life. Following by email is the best way for us to help each other. Let’s get you the break you need and the deeper connection and fulfillment you want.