3 Powerful Ways to Be a Better Mom in the Morning | Tips from a Non-morning Person

I know there are some people who just pop right out of bed in the morning, feeling everyday like the sun is shining and everything’s right with the world. Ok, maybe I don’t know it, but it seems like there are probably some people out there somewhere. That being said, it’s not me. It’s much easier for me to stay up late than get up early. I love the snooze button and savor sleeping in. However, mom life doesn’t usually lend itself to snooze buttons and sleeping in. And I want to be a good mom all the time, not just after a certain time. So here are three powerful ways to be a better mom in the morning, even if you’re not naturally a morning person either.

A Late Night

It was past midnight when my son cried out. He’d been sick, so I wasn’t surprised to hear his discomfort. I grabbed a book and headed into his bedroom. In his half-awake state, he asked me to snuggle. So I laid beside him.

The baby crying startled him awake again. “Come back!” he said as I climbed out of bed. So I did. I brought the baby in. Sitting up next to my son, I nursed the baby and started reading by the dim light from the hall.

Not too much later, the baby was full and sleeping contently in my arms. My son slept soundly by my side. And by all standards of sanity, I should have gone to bed.

But I didn’t.

I sat right there and read. The quiet, the comfortable room, and the good book were worth staying up late. And that’s me.

Still a Good Mom

I’d much rather stay up late than get up early.

I actually really like the early morning too, when the house is quiet and the world outside is peaceful. During some seasons of life, I’ve coerced myself into waking early each morning, and maybe someday my motherhood season will switch to full-on morning mode. But just because I’m not naturally a morning person, it doesn’t mean I can’t be a good mom in the morning.

That’s the thing about most moms: we pretty much want to be a good mom all the time.

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3 Powerful Ways to Be a Better Mom in the Morning

So whether mornings are tough because you’re up all night with kids, stay up binge reading, or love the automatic “Play the next episode” feature, I hope these few powerful tips help you be a better mom in the morning, just like you want to be.

1. Decide It’s Really, Truly What You Actually Want

We all want to be a better mom in the morning, but here’s the key question: do we want it more than anything else?

What we want in life really does matter. It influences our nonconsious responses. Our desires set our expectations and remember…

Unmet expectations are a thief of joy.

Go to a gut-level of honesty with yourself about what you care about in the mornings. Decide with your adult brain that you want to be a good mom in the morning more than anything else. More than ten extra minutes of sleep or even hot coffee. (Gasp!) (I actually don’t drink coffee, so I’m going to need some comment input on this point. 🙂 )

We and our children have a lot of needs that need to be met in order to be healthy and happy. But a helpful thing to realize is that not all of these needs have to be met first thing in the morning. We can do the hard work to figure out what matters to us and intentionally create space for it throughout our day, including what we want our mornings to include most.

If we choose to have an elaborate plan for our best morning routine ever and high hopes for what we want to have happen, then when it all inevitably crumbles at times, we can say with sincerity, “But at least I was a good mom this morning.”

2. Create the Easiest Morning Routine Ever

As I mentioned, there have been times when I’ve gotten up early and enjoyed a nice morning routine with all my favorites: reading scripture, exercising, taking a hot shower, and such. But there have also been times when I consciously chose to not wake up before my kids. My only time with my husband was late at night after he finished work, I still had little ones waking in the night, and despite what some cultural norms might suggest, Mama really DOES need her sleep.

And sometimes even during the early morning seasons, a child would wake up early too and join me.

So whether you choose to wake-up before your kids or not, I suggest we all have an intentional morning routine. And I’m talking about the easiest morning routine ever. How do you want to spend the first three to five minutes of your day?

Ideas for a Super Simple, Super Helpful Morning Routine for Moms

Here are the three things I suggest we all include in our easy morning routine:

1. Make the Bed

This is a simple way to get your body moving and signal to the brain that we’re going to have a productive day. It helps the room feel less cluttered when you return later. (And it makes it harder to climb back into bed on those days you know you shouldn’t but turned down sheets look so inviting.) Making the bed allows us to start the day with an easy win.

2. Do a Gratitude Practice

Studies have shown over and over and over that expressing gratitude increases our sense of well-being. And it doesn’t matter how we show that gratitude; we can pray, make a list in a gratitude journal, write a note, or whatever. What does matter is that we feel that gratitude sincerely.

3. Set an Intention for the Day

This is what living an intentional life and being an intentional parent is all about. We get to decide who we want to become and what kind of home we want to create. So set an intention for something you want to focus on, work on, or make happen that day. Intentions can be included in an affirmation, as part of a prayer, in a one-sentence journal entry, or otherwise.

The Beauty of the First Three Minutes

The beauty of the first three minutes is that they always happen. Even on days when we’re running late or woken by a crying baby, we can take three minutes first. We can set the tone for the day with simplicity and intention. Whether you go on to have a longer solo morning routine or get going with the kids right away, these three intentional minutes are a powerful way to start the day every day.

Related: How to Start Family Routines that Transform Life from Chaos to Calm (This is helpful if you want more about setting up a good morning routine for your whole family.)

3. Connect First

The first time you see your child in the morning, make the intentional choice to connect. Hug your child. Look in their eyes. Tell them how great they did going to sleep on their own last night or putting their toys away yesterday or anything else positive. Older kids love a warm hug and joint commiseration about how early they have to get up. Tell your child you’re excited for your day together or feel so lucky to be their mom.

It’s really easy to get wrapped up in checking email, getting food going, figuring out the schedule for the day, or sleepily wondering why we thought it was a good idea to stay up so late. But taking even one moment to connect first thing is incredibly powerful. That moment of pause, of being present, is good for our kids and good for us.

Because more than anything else, what we all need in life is connection.

One of the longest running studies of human development is finding that the greatest predicter of both health and happiness is good relationships. Mounds of other research shows us that the biggest factors of long-term well-being have to do with the strength of our bonds or the emotions inside our relationships.

A clean house is nice, a hot breakfast is delicious (and I never pass it up!), other work is probably important, but connection is vital to health and happiness. When we start the day with connection, we’re showing up in a way that meets our kids’ most important needs. We’re not just being a better mom, we’re being the best kind of mom.

Related: How to Connect with a Difficult Child

Here’s to a Better Morning for Moms and Families

These three ways to be a better mom in the morning by deciding what really matters most to you, creating the easiest morning routine ever, and connecting first are all really simple. My goal in keeping them simple for me and for is that we look at these and say, “Yes, I can do that.” And when we do, we’re creating a better morning for us and for our families. Because although these tips are simple, they’re incredibly powerful.

When do you feel like it’s been a great morning? What makes mornings hard for you? Share in the comments!

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